It's 2am now. I have nothing else better to do other than blogging here. But still I can't think of anything to share here.

I'm officially 21st now. Do not have a big party, do not have expensive presents, do not have grand dinner. Everything was just random and simple. Celebrated with my loved ones on the 23rd and 24th. People that wished me had actually made my day. Thanks Leng that did the organizing. People that called me from overseas made my birthday much meaningful.

As I grow older, I do not really feel like celebrating. I felt that there's no meaning celebrating when you have to make everyone sit down when they are busy with their own stuff. Spending a big amount of money just to fulfill the tradition of giving presents. Sighh... I've told E. not to have any special fancy celebration next year onwards as I do not want to go through all the traditions. I want special yet simple. Sounds easy but it's actually the hardest part. Haha... Okay, forget about it.

Next week is the last week in TARC studying. I'm so gonna miss college days. I will definitely miss those days where all of us were late for class, thinking of how to quietly sneak out from class for snacks, struggling to finish assignments the night before deadline, all praying and burning the midnight oil at the very last minute before stepping into the exam hall........ Bla bla bla.... Oh gosh, I have a lot to miss then.

In addition, meeting with the new friends from PR were bonus for me. Whenever I passby canteen 1, I will keep looking at the foyer, missing those days where we were busying set up, running up and down during event day and gone crazy after event day. I miss everything, moments with my PR friends.

Tears seems so easy to drop recently. Everything, everywhere, every moments can easily makes me cry. I just can't control. I love her but still I can't accept it. I miss her and I am so regret now. E. keep asking me to be strong, but I can't. It's ain't easy. She's the one took care of me when I was small, keep reminding us to study hard, earn more money in order to give our parents a better life. But, she did not even wait until I graduate, I get married, I earn money, to give her a better life, be proud of me and witness my growth. I did not have this chance. I miss he so much now, as I typed this, I just couldn't stop my tears from coming out. For me, it's a great loss!!!

好庆幸，我离开了。三年前的我，简直是活在黑暗，恐惧中。傻乎乎的我，竟然犯下如此严重的错，让我的人生留下了污点。如果当初的我，没拿出勇气，我今天也不会好好的。

回想起三年前，一点都不像自己。幸福是什么也不知道。活在他人的控制下，一点自由都没有，跟现在的我完全相反。

当我知道有人跟我发生同样的事情时，我真得很伤心，也不知道到底还会有多少个受害者。我不是胆小懦弱，我只是想要些平静的生活。以前的生活真难受，真得让我后悔。很不希望有人再受伤。

阿铃，谢谢你当初陪在我身边。我的起起落落，都因为有你的耳朵与肩膀，才会让我站得起来。

宝贝，谢谢你选择了我，让我感觉到什么叫幸福。谢谢你的爱。

Finally the event have come to an end. No photos will be uploaded so soon cause I'm extremely exhausted!!!

Take care for another amazing week ahead!!!

ROADBLOCKERS!!!!

Had lunch near my house today and was totally pissed off by a very very rude couple, especially the gf!!!!

There was this Camry driving at a very small alley, which is a two way street. This Camry came out from this alley and there's a Nissan wanted to go into the alley. So, both the cars met and non of them wanted to take a move and give way.

The Camry guy came down, open the door for the stupid gf and walked away. People nearby asked the couple to move away but still the very arrogant gf said she have no wrong and went for tea!!! This stupid gf thought that she's the beauty queen, very rich and everybody is admiring her. She's totally wrong here!!! She's just like Cinderella's step sister!!!

The very kiasu but also arrogant bf turned back and took picture of the Nissan. Since he chosed to leave the car, what for he's afraid that people will do something to his car? Superb kiasu here.

And finally the Nissan give way. Reason being the Camry couple can be so arrogant is because their car have those kind of plat that shows he's one of those Tan Sri ke, Datuk ke, I tak tau. Biadap aje I tau.

I really feel like slapping the gf until her face swollen and beg me to stop. How can a girl act like this?!?! Sigh....

Hurray~~~~ It's weekend. I didn't get to really enjoy my weekends since that incident and felt that weekend pass very very fast. I get to utilize my weekends now.

Sometimes, it's really very very tired to go college, attend meetings, go for classes and rush for thesis and essays. Sigh... I guess this is life. My beloved wen qian always tells me that it's just a turning point. Problems and difficulties that we met, it's only part of the challenges in our life.

If you think you can, YOU CAN!!

I'm missing her now. Awww....

I can't wait until December as I wish I can buy things without paying.

Bless me

Started to get used to everything now. Felt glad that I still have friends that love me around, to cherish and support each other everytime we needed each other.

Special thanks to Tia, IreneTan, susumin for always loving me and TALK with me through fb.

Special thanks to JaCie, for being so straight forward and heart to heart talk with me.

Special thanks to Leng, for always being there and listen to all my YES or NO stories, ended up with a very BIG head!!

Special thanks to chinyee, for being there encouraging me to eat eat eat and ended up me so BIG as well.

Special thanks to mushy, for being there to share stories bout the partners, and also 3 8 around on unimportant people.

Special thanks to KC, for talking nonsense with me in msn.

I have lots of people to thanks but can't think more at this moment.

For those that I have yet to thanks, I'm so sorry cause I have STM (short-term memory). But I still love you kay....???

I feel so much better now, and am ready to push myself to the max and move forward!!!

THANKS

THANKS

THANKS

My life is now brighter than before

Lastly, Thanks Mr E.

It's week 5 now. I don't have any time extra to be wasted anymore. There were too many things happened throughout these five weeks, super duper happy and super duper sad, one lum sum in five weeks! I know this might be a growing path, but it had dragged a long period and I'm getting weaker and tired.

Totally have no idea what to do in college, super blurr during meetings and thesis. I don't wanna fail therefore I'm doing my very best now. I don't want to be a problematic student!!! I just need more time to get everything back on track. I've missed almost two weeks of class, out of FIVE!!!!

I wonder how people judge me now....